Insanity

My life is insane! No, not the way you think...To this day, I awake every morning and remind myself that I am the mother of triplets. That there are three babies sleeping in the room next door who, in their own baby language, call ME 'mom.' You'd think I'd be used that by now, but I'm not. And in a way, I hope I never am. The novelty of my life is that out of the greatest pain I've known, came the greatest blessings. I don't ever want to forget what that journey felt like...

I constantly think about the years that passed me by, leaving me completely devastated and without any hope of ever having children. I remember the familiar lump in my throat I got each time that pregnancy test was negative and how I would force myself to smile anyway, even though inside I was crying uncontrollably asking that all too familiar question, "Why me?" I think about the pain I endured from the hundreds of shots I had to take, and how I reminded myself that someday, it would all be worth it. I remember the devastation of losing a tiny baby just weeks after my prayers had finally been answered. These are the moments I hope I never forget. They are the moments when all I had was hope.

And now, my babies are days away from their first birthday. My babies. That's what's insane. The rest of it...the thousands of diapers, the toys everywhere, the crying, the kids crawling in 2 directions....that's the fun part. There are alphabet magnets on my refrigerator, the tupperware cupboard is now a lesson in exploration and noise. The hooks on my coat rack are occupied by at least 9 tiny sweatshirts and jackets. My tub is full of water toys and baby shampoo. There are three highchairs in my kitchen. The silverware drawer has as many pink, blue, and green spoons as it does silver. There are Gerber puffs in the cracks of my couches and spit up stains on ALL my clothes. But the best part is that there are three babies who I get to love for the rest of my days....This is my new life.

I looked back through my own blog last night at old entries (you know, since there weren't any new ones!) and what memories it brought back of a practically flawless pregnancy that led up to the babies' birthday. Recounting the moments waiting for the babies to be born and the relief and complete overwhelm I felt each time they announced that another baby was born. And then, I got to the part where I had been in recovery for at least 4 hours, at this point the ONLY person who had not gotten to meet my own babies, and my eyes started to well up... And I kept reading until I got to the part where my nurse decided to take me up to the NICU to meet my tiny, tiny bundles all alone, and I cried. I cried last night like I did almost a year ago the moment I got to finally hold each one of them in my arms. It was breathtaking then and it still is now.

I have three unique little persons who are charming, adventurous, silly, brave, peaceful, obnoxious, loving and absolutely the lights of my life. I struggle every day as I think all parents must. I love each new day more than the one before it because they learn something new, get a little more independent, and gain a lot more personality. And yet, each new day is a reminder that my babies are growing up...{sigh}

So anyway, this was not at all the direction I had planned for this hodge-podge of a blog, but it's past midnight, so it will have to do...more to come. In the meantime, enjoy these pictures of all the things that have been going on in our world!

1. WE MASTERED THE ART OF STEALING

Typical scenario. Let me just say that the blue maraca Colton is holding was in Ethan's hands only moments before I took this picture. Look how pleased Colton is with himself.

Okay brother, I'm sorry. I will hug you now.

2. WE LIKE JAMBA JUICE. JUST LIKE OUR MOMMY.

3. ETHAN LEARNED TO HELP GRAMMA DO LAUNDRY.

Well, sort of.

4. COLTON DISCOVERED A LOVE OF PLAYING UNDER TABLES.

5. DAD LEARNED HOW CONVENIENT OVERALLS ARE FOR CATCHING FAST CRAWLING BABIES.

6. I WITNESSED MY FRIEND NICOLE'S NEW CAKE MAKING SKILLS!

7. WE TOOK OUR 3 LITTLE CLOWNS TO THEIR FIRST CARNIVAL! (At school)

There we saw some of our friends! Mrs. Lofgren and Andy!

8. GRAMMA BOUGHT A HAMSTER CAGE TO PUT US IN!

Uncle Emilio even got in with us!

9. WE GOT A NEW TABLE TO SIT AND PLAY AT...Or under...

10. We DISCOVERED HOW MUCH FUN IT IS TO PLAY ON "FISHER PRICE MOMMY!"

I'm not gonna lie. I kinda like these pictures because my tummy looks almost pre-triplets here!

And that's all for now....there are more entries on deck. I will not slack. I will not slack. I will not slack. Thank you for sticking with me and continuing to read about our adventures! Knowing how many of you enjoy it is what makes it so worth writing!