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Monday, September 5, 2011

Miniature Masterminds

Have you ever felt as though you are being ganged up on? As though you are the only one who is not 'in' on the secrets and the plans? Welcome to parenting of toddler triplets. I have given up on the notion that my children are angelic and well behaved. This story is best begun with a phrase Brian and I often reserve for only the most interesting events...It goes like this.

"You see, what had happened was...."

Saturday night Brian had to work which left me home alone with the trio. Like all nights, I put them to bed at 8:30. Three piggy back rides, 3 'snug-as-a-bug-in-a-rug's and about 30 kisses later, I turned on their soft music, turned off the lights and left their room. I cozied up on the couch with my glass of wine and watched 'Something Borrowed' on OnDem.and.

Note that I said I 'put them to bed' NOT 'put them to sleep' at 8:30. That was precisely because they rarely go right to bed. It is very normal for them to stay awake for another hour talking, laughing, jumping, etc. This is typically fine with us because once they're up, they're up. Unless there is throw-up or poop, they aint gettin' out and they know that. So what they do up there is fine by us. Eventually, they fall asleep. :)

On this particular night however, despite being totally engrossed in my movie, I noticed that they were particularly rambunctious and not showing signs of slowing down one bit. There was yelling, oh yes, but it was more the kind of yelling you do at a sporting event. You know, like when you're cheering on your team. Something in me said I should probably go check on them.

Making my way up the stairs, I noted that the yelling had turned to great laughter. (Which makes it much more difficult for me to do my 'stern mommy' act. I approached their door and gently pushed it open a few inches, scanning the 3 cribs for immediate signs of danger, entrapped body parts, etc.

What I found, was this.
In case you are not familiar with the layout of their room, let me enlighten you. Ethan's crib is on the left wall, Hunter's is in the middle and Colton's is on the right. So now, if you would be so kind as to look at that photo again, you will notice that Ethan is IN Hunter's crib, and is looking pleased as punch with himself. As soon as I opened that door and noticed 2 shadows in one crib, I immediately had to turn my back and look out into the hallway in hopes that they would not see my uncontrolled laughter. At some point, I walked back down to get my cellphone so I could quickly snap a picture (did you expect anything less?) and then I went in, and despite my better judgement laughed WITH them. They knew good and well that they had done something wrong AND that it was pretty damn funny.

I placed the escapee back into his own baby jail and did the best scolding-through-laughter I could muster. The rest of the night was uneventful. I finished my movie and went to bed at about midnight when Brian got home.

Now, our bedroom door is just a few feet from theirs which makes listening to their conversations pretty easy. The next morning they started to wake up at about 8:00. Like most mornings, we allow them the fun of waking up together and having some time to 'chat' amongst themselves before we go and get them. These moments have gotten funnier and funnier as their language has improved.

So this particular morning, Brian and I are noticing that Hunter is particularly vocal, uttering phrases like, "C'mon Ethan. You can do it." and "Coton, you come in my bed? You come in my bed too?" and "Good job." We immediately realize that they are reenacting the Great Escape from the night before. After listening for about 20 minutes I decide to go in and bust them. What I find, is this.

Again, let me help you with your orientation here. That is Colton's crib on the right, and Hunter's in the middle. Ethan's is not shown in this photo. That is THREE CHILDREN IN ONE CRIB. That means Ethan (aka Houdini) scaled not one, but TWO cribs to get over there. He does this by either pulling himself over the railing on his belly, or by swinging a leg over and straddling two cribs at once. I now realize that Hunter's questioning of "Colton, you come in my bed too?" was simply another case of her misusing her pronouns, much the same way that she says, "Momma, I help you?" when she means, "Momma, can you help me?"

I believe my words when I swung that door open went something like, "ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?!$"

Anyhoo, fool me once shame on you, fool me twice, well, shame on me. Fool me 3 times? Don't even think about it. Before bed that night, Brian and I wised up and turned Hunter's crib so that all three were now parallel with one another, increasing the space between their cribs just enough that no one is able to crib-hop any more.

When I say that they were mad, understand that what I mean is, they were FURIOUS. Hunter pleaded, "I seep in Coton's bed' no less than 26 times and was more and more mad each time I refused her pleas.

As usual, they eventually fell asleep. The next morning, this is what I found.
A freakin revolt. The prisoners tossed every pillow, blanket, stuffed animal, toy car, you name it out of their cribs and onto the floor. "Pretty sure they were saying, "FINE! Take that!"

Are you kidding me, people?

Rest assured, their twin beds are on order and will be arriving in approximately one week. Good times ahead.

On a much more innocent note, I am an AUNTIE! My sweet niece Brinley was born on August 26 at 5:02 pm. She was 8 lbs 4 oz and 19 inches long. She is about as sweet a baby as they come. I simply adore her.

I got to be in the O.R. with my sister for her C-Section and let me tell you what a moment that was. For one thing, it was a surreal flashback to my own children's birth, minus about 24 people in the room and two, to see another human being be pulled into this world is about the coolest thing ever. Both Mary and I were overcome with happy tears as I proclaimed how absolutely perfect she is. And yes, I will forever remember that I got to hold her first. :) What a proud moment...I have a niece.

No doubt she will be a very common thread in this blog from this day forth. Welcome to the world Brinley!

(And a belated 'Welcome to the world to the DeBauche Triplets, Sophia, Madelyn and Isabelle! We've all been waiting for you and are pulling for speedy trips out of the NICU!)


Mary said...

So sneaky those Bunchkins! I love that they can talk to each other though :) the ganging up has only just begun! Brinley will learn lots of good stuff from her cousins...

Kim said...

Ahhh, you are outnumbered Ami!! Great story!!

Sarah said...

I just can't stop laughing! It's never good to be outnumbered by your children.

Unknown said...

This is wonderful! I miss you a11! xoxo elaine

Jeremy DeBauche said...

Your kids are incredible! I can't stop laughing. How bold and adventurous they are. Makes me wonder what other sorts of mischief they'll wander upon as they get older :) Our girls' cribs are configured the same way, so now you have me wondering...

By the way, congrats on becoming an aunt. Brinley is beautiful!

Nicole said...

Hhehehe.... that is awesome. Sorry, but it is:)Love you!

Heather said...

I feel your pain. You think you're ready for the great escape -- but you never are. That's why it took us until our kids were almost three years old to buy a video monitor. Once they were loose, we had to know what was going on in there. . . . And boy was THAT enlightening!! Good luck.

Faith said...

Is that kind of revolt something that I have to look forward to with my twins??? Luckily, we have a extra room so when they go into their toddler beds (or maybe even before) they will be separated for my sanity as well as their climbing skills ;)

Britnie said...

Hi Ami, I'm a newer reader and I have been going back and reading all of your posts. This one, in particular, has forced me to comment. Hahahahahaha! Your trips are amazingly hysterical and quite limber to go crib hopping. Impressive. And I would have had the same reaction as you. I often find myself asking my 18 month old, Tessa, the same "are you freaking kidding me?!" to which, her actions reply "no, I am not!" thank you for allowing me to delight in the debacles your adorable little ones get in to!!

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