Don't Blink

This afternoon, I took the trips to Catalina Pediatrics for their 11 year old well checks to prepare for Middle School.

Yes. These are COVID times...masks for all. 

Wait-did you get that? Let me repeat.

This afternoon,

I took the trips

for their 11 YEAR OLD well checks

to prepare for MIDDLE SCHOOL. 

Yup. 11 years. Middle School. 

{Gulp.}

I think as a parent the craziest part of seeing the same doctor for so many years is how you can be instantly transported, the moment the doors to the office open, right back to the days where you sweated your booty off getting three infants in and out of carseats and strollers, onto the exam table and off, cuddling, snuggling, wiping tears, then reloading them into the stroller and back into carseats.

4 MONTHS OLD

ETHAN & COLTON

 HUNTER

Do I miss those days? Honestly? I do.

Which is not to say I don't cherish the age they are now, because let's be very clear, there is something pretty awesome about handing each of them their own reports to read. And they can answer their own questions about their health and I don't have to hold them after they get shots! They're just as goofy as ever during their appointments and there's no question we provide entertainment to all who enter our room!

Anyhoodle. I guess it's official. I can't use "no shot records" as an excuse to keep my kids out of middle school. Sigh...I guess I have to let go.

But it's okay. They have Hunter, their 2nd mom to look out for them.
Yes, those were THEIR words to Dr. Goldberg today! :)

My littles are growing up.

Same table. 11 years apart.  :) 

Guess Who??

Oh, hey world! Remember me? Remember us?? Well I barely did...I just spent the past hour trying to remember how to get into my own blog! (#facetopalm). Do people even read blogs anymore? Is this still a thing? Guys-the last time I blogged was THREE AND A  HALF YEARS AGO! November 2016.  And that was just a couple entries. Oy, freaking vey.

Now my trio have promoted from 5th grade to middle school (in the middle of a global pandemic.) So much has changed...maybe that's what's got me feeling the need to document life.

When I started writing this blog, it seemed to have fallen nicely into a time when people were as entranced with baby blogs as I was...triplet ones to boot. Add in the Cleft Palate issues, the cranial helmets, you know, we were your run-of-the-mill NON run-of-the-mill family. People seemed to crave that feeling you got from reading on someone else's blog that other people's kids bit each other as hard as yours (#Hunter) or that potty training was hard for EVERYONE, and that her house is as messy as yours. Or they just needed to laugh when someone's kid cut his own hair (#Ethan) or drew all over the furniture with ballpoint pens (#Colton) That shit was refreshing.

But do people even read about kids who are about to enter middle school? I wouldn't know. Most of us seem to fall off the blogging bandwagon long before this milestone occurs.

So, I guess the question is, CAN one resurrect a blog? Well, I honestly don't know. But I'm going to try. Right after I go sit on the couch and do nothing for a while. Perhaps while I'm sitting there, I'll google  'CRAP MIDDLE SCHOOLERS DO THAT IS WORTHY OF DOCUMENTING FOR LIFE WITHOUT MAKING THEM HATE THEIR MOM.'  Stay tuned....

I'm bringin' blogging back! YEAH!

Thank goodness for Facebook and it's 'On This Day' feature. I am regularly reminded how awesome a blogger I once was. (And consequently, how awesome I am NOT now.) Lately, I see a post pop up and I find myself entranced in old posts, reliving the memories for as long as the time allows. I think we always 'think' we'll just remember all the moments for years to come, but the truth is, we don't. (Okay well, I don't.)  And so, I'm grateful to have written them down. I'm grateful that the kids have this to look back on because just as I had hope, they so enjoy watching old videos, seeing pictures of themselves as squishy babies getting into mischief and just generally, growing up.

They're seven now. As in, YEARS. Okay, truth be told, they're closer to EIGHT.

They're missing teeth and they have new awkward grown up teeth coming in. They use phrases like "Hey, Bro." and "What's up dog? and they describe cool things as 'epic' and 'legit.' She wears makeup for fun and changes outfits more times in a day than I care to discuss. And all the while, I'm over here in the corner in the fetal position wishing someone would poop in their diaper or cry for a bottle.

Life is short.

I don't want to forget this stuff. True, they aren't as squishy and little anymore, and their voices aren't as itty bitty. No one lisps and fewer and fewer words are said incorrectly. But they're still amazing kids and I don't want to forget these days. So I'm making some changes 'round here. All over the place. Trying to simplify where I can.  So stay tuned. I'm already working on my topics...I'm bringing Bunchkins back....YEAH!  Don't they look thrilled? Hee hee..

Brothers in love

I'm never quite sure what to tell people when reference to this blog comes up....Do I say, "Oh hey! I have a blog (I mean, I DO...technically) or is it really more accurate to say, "Yeah, once I had a blog..." Or do I just say, "Well I have this blog I stopped writing a few years ago..."  Uugh. Which always makes me think I should just start writing again.  I mean, I know they're not the cute, cuddly little baby triplets anymore, but they're still kinda cute...in a 'they're-growing-up-and-talk-about-farts-alot-but-are-also-super-cool' kinda way.  :)

What to do...what to do...

And where would I even start? I mean, did you know they went to Preschool? For TWO years? And then Kindergarten? And then first grade?? For the love, they're starting SECOND GRADE in August? What the what? So many great stories left behind...

The good news for those of you were readers waaaayyy back when is that WE'VE SURVIVED! All of us! Life is just as interesting and  just as hilarious. Maybe even more so...

Case in point. We just pulled up to the house after running some errands. 2 out 3 kids promptly exited the vehicle. (It's 112 degrees here today). I smartly quipped to Colton, the lone leftover kid, "So..you feel like gettin' out any time soon?" 

He responds in the most serious demeanor, "I'm just thinkin' about my girlfriend." 

Conversation in my head --------> {WHAT THE WHAT? Your WHAT???} 

Actual conversation, "Oh yeah? Whatcha thinking about her?" 

Colton: "I just miss her. She's not going to be in my class in second grade." 

Ethan: "Yeah, I'm pretty sure she's gonna be in my class."

Me:(STUPID ME) : Uh oh, I hope your brother doesn't steal your girlfriend. (Why would I even SAY that? Sometimes I forget they're only 7. Lol.)

Colton: "Well, I like her 1000%, so.... Ethan, do you like her, too?" 

Ethan: "Uh, just a little. Well, actually about 89%."  (These are their actual stats. I could not make this stuff up.)

Colton: "Well someday, I'm still going to marry her, I think." 

Ethan: "Well actually, turns out I like her infinity %, so, I guess I like her more." 

Colton: "But she's still my girlfriend." 

Ethan: "Okay." 

And just like that, their 'bro brawl' was done.  I can only hope that is the last time they 'fight' over a girl. Oy vey.  

(Don't you love their goggle heads? They are fresh from a weekend stay at the Arizona Grand with my dad, his wife, and my sister and nieces where they more or less learned how to swim! Finally!) 

They really are great friends....

Currently playing with their beyblades...

"1-2-3...Let...it....

"RIP!"

 Ethan: "Dude! That was an epic battle! You totally owned that one."  

Aww! Their little surfer dude selves really DO love each other.

Reading is its own reward! (kind of)

Do you have children? 

Do they love reading or do they just tolerate it? 

Are you looking for ways to increase motivation and skill during their summer vacations? 

Do you want your kids to willingly pull books off the shelf and read? 

Well look no further. I have the answer. 

(Okay, well TECHNICALLY, Colton has the answer.)  

No. I did not PAY him to read. (Like I would ever bribe my kids like that…..)

You see, what had happened was….

About 15 minutes after we tucked the kids into bed last night, Brian and I could STILL hear giggling and funny noises coming from the boys' room. (not entirely out of character, because well, they ARE boys) except that the agreement was that we would leave their lamp on so they could read, but they had to be quiet. You know, so as not to confuse reading time with play time.)  Because that would, {ahem} never happen. 

So I went upstairs to *review* the agreement and be sure all parties were abiding by said agreement. As soon as I appeared in their doorway, Colton was excitedly pointing to the book in his lap, spouting off something about, "Look what I saw in my book! Look what what I found!" 

Now, I'm not going to lie. The fact that he was reading 'Dick and Jane' left me a little leery. I mean, I know it's a kids' book and all, but seriously. It feels a little naughty listening to your 6 read "Oh, oh, oh Dick. Dick went up, up, up. Come down, Dick." (Yes, Dick went up the tree to catch 'Puff' the cat and Jane wanted him to come down.) (Sorry, but why couldn't he have been named Nick? Or Rick?).

So naturally, my immediate thoughts were that he had realized some alternate meanings in the illustrations or words…Well he had not. Thank God.

He found something much better… A DOLLAR!! Hidden betwixt the pages of the Great Dick and Jane Treasury! The greatest reward ever given to a child! Well what do you suppose happened after that? He and his partner in crime, Ethan, began opening book after book, searching for more hidden treasures! 

Brilliant. 

That's all I have to say about that. Seriously. I'm half inclined to raid their piggy banks and hide dollar bills inside various books as a reward for reading! It's a win-win, the way I see it! 

They already love to read...

This makes choosing books more fun and interesting…

I don't have to spend my own money…

As they FIND dollars, they'll put them back into their banks…

And I, their deceptive mother will continually reuse those dollars….

It's magic. 

(Side note: I'm pretty sure we owe my sister, Mary $1.00. She loaned us this book which she bought from an online garage sale. It's probably her change. See me about that, Mary…)  

   

All this joking aside, I am eternally thankful that they enjoy books as much as they do. For the boys it was a matter of finding easier readers, particularly nonfiction, to peak their interest and make them realize they CAN read. For Hunter, it took nothing. Girl can read anything. And she wants to. 

Hooray for summer! I hope you, too, stumble upon creative, surprising ways to bribe inspire your children to read or do chores or something even better! 

My heart hurts

I used to have so much to say.

Triplets, Preemies, NICUs, Cranial Bands, Cleft Lips, Cleft Palates….Yep, once upon a time this blog was a stepping stone for others walking our same path in life; a stepping stone for others facing the same challenges. It almost feels strange that the days of shelling out my "learned wisdom" about these topics have come and gone. It's like we've reached an age and a place in life where we're just….normal.

There's a lot of happy in that, I suppose. It IS sort of freeing not to be an 'expert' on these things anymore, because I HAVE actually forgotten how to efficiently fill 18 bottles a day or how the valves and pieces fit in Colton's Habermann Bottle. And I literally don't remember how often I washed their helmets. I don't. 

You might even say I've become complacent with this 'uneventful' life of mine.

Until tonight.

Tonight I was painfully reminded that our story is not over…and that my job as a mother will forever be a million times harder than teaching could ever be. 

I have 3 kids. They grew together, were born together, and are raised together. They are triplets and there's a lot of 'sameness' that goes with that.

But the reality is that one is different. (Yes, my intellectual self knows and appreciates that  they are ALL different, but one feels it a little more than the others.) He feels it in ways they can't yet comprehend. And I would literally take back every insecurity and every flaw I've ever had about myself (and there are a lot) to take this away from my Colton.

We were just sitting around the dinner table having homemade banana splits, partaking in our usual line of "how was your day" questioning. It begins with whoever thinks to ask first; tonight that was Ethan.

"Hunter, how was your day?" 

"And what was your favorite part?" 

"And what was your worst part?"

She, in turn, asks Colton the same questions.

If we're keeping track, he had a good day. His favorite part was painting birdhouses and eating ice cream. And if I'm being honest, he had a hard time thinking of a worst part.

But before he moved on, he very abruptly lifted up his upper lip, exposing his top teeth. Ever so innocently, he asks, "Mom, do my teeth still look funny? Are they still crooked?"

Trying not to appear flustered, I very 'breezily' said, "Well let me see. Um, yep. They're still a little bit crooked, but they still look really good to me. Why?"

"Because 'B' {his best friend} makes fun of my teeth sometimes. He says they look funny."

And just like that- it happened. He realized he's different.

If I were a superhero, my powers would be remaining calm and collected when all I want to do is fall apart.

I shot a look at Brian basically pleading in silence for him to say something because I wasn't sure I could, without crying. I needed a second to compose myself.

"Hey bud, your teeth are a little bit different right now, but pretty soon, they'll be all fixed up. Don't you worry about what other people say about them, okay? Everybody's a little bit different from each other and what's important is that you know how special and handsome you are." 

This bit of saving advice gave me enough time to well away the tears and interject my own wisdom.

"Colton, here's the thing. You're actually kind of a superhero, you know. You're only 5 years old and you've already had 3 surgeries! (I'm including his ear tubes) What other kid can say that? 'B' can't say that! Nobody I know is as tough as you are. When you were born, you had a hole in the roof of your mouth and Dr. Hurst fixed you all up! He fixed your lip and your palate (brief intermission here to explain what his palate is) and pretty soon, he's going to fix your teeth too!"  {And breathe….}

"But why was I born with a hole in my mouth?" (Said in a tone that showed more concern with the why HIM part than the hole in the mouth part.)

Again. time felt as if it had slowed almost to a stop. His eyes and his little self were waiting for an answer. And I wasn't sure I had a good one.

"Buddy, I don't know why. Maybe because God knew you were tough enough and brave enough to  handle it. 

Not entirely sure he was convinced, he at least allowed Brian and I to sprinkle our hopeless bits of wisdom upon him and the other two. We went back and forth with all the things you're supposed to say when your kids are feeling hurt; all the things you tell kids about tolerance and acceptance and treating everyone with kindness even when they look different. We talked about how Hunter's eyes didn't work so well and she needed to have glasses, etc.

And in case you're wondering what his demeanor was this whole time, you could almost say he was  unphased. And yet, he was thinking about it. He thinks about it. Something in that moment made him ask about it.

But just like that, the game moved on.

Colton looked over at me and asked, "Mom, how was your day?" 

I smiled and said, "It was a good day." 

"What was your favorite part?" he asked next.  "Um, watching you play outside and having ice cream with you."

And I knew it was coming…..

"And what was your worst part?" he asked.

{what to say, what to say…}

"Right now." I said. "Hearing that you feel a little sad about your teeth hurts my heart." 

The game continued until everyone had had a turn and almost as abruptly as it began, they were asking to be excused from the table. I've never been so eager to let them leave. Brian sent them upstairs to get ready for bed and I just sat, my back to everyone.

And I cried. Silent,  guilty, hopeless tears. And Brian knew. He sat down beside me and said all the things you're supposed to say when your wife falls apart.

I can never shake the guilt that he's a triplet and yet, he's the only one who has to deal with this crap. I can never shake the guilt that perhaps something I did or didn't do during the pregnancy caused his cleft lip and palate. I can never shake the guilt that I can be there for him forever and I can fuddle my words left and right when he needs a pep talk, but I can never take it away. I can't take away the surgeries and the pain that are yet to come.

Amidst my sobs, Brian so eloquently reminded me that maybe I was looking at it from the wrong perspective; he reminded me that Colton is going to lead the way, that he's going to shape someone else. He's going to teach someone about tolerance; and through it all he'll have his brother and sister to have his back. Maybe THAT's why he's a triplet.

Sometimes I like it when he's right.

Colton,

My wish as your mother is that you will realize the strength you have. That you will be courageous enough to stand tall when you're feeling down or when you're feeling different. My hope is that you will continue to rise above it and that you'll be able to see the handsome young man we all see. That you will find comfort in knowing that you're never alone. You are my hero. And you have been for almost 6 years now. I love you bud.

Now THIS is love. 

[Side note- I wanted to add to this story that neither Colton nor any of us are upset with his friend, nor do I think his friend even meant it harshly. I am pretty confident the whole conversation was spurred more by a 5 year old's curiosity than intent to be mean. Kids are just honest. Sometimes too much. ]  :) 

Inspiration can be found in the oddest places...

So, I'll be the first to recognize that my skills as a blogger as of late BLOW. But wait for it. Today, I got one of the greatest laughs I've gotten in a while and well, it sparked that old feeling of, "Oh my gosh, I have to blog this!"

So this afternoon, I'm busily working away on numerous projects for work and I left the little boys upstairs on my bed, watching CARS. It was harmless. No really. It was. Well it WAS. Until Brian went upstairs to get laundry.

Cuz that's when  I heard it. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING? GO DOWNSTAIRS RIGHT NOW AND SHOW YOUR MOTHER WHAT YOU'RE DOING. " {cue tears and feet dragging} And then I saw it. Ethan Scissorhands. Hairstylist extraordinaire. Oh. My.

I was able to get in about 18 stern words filled with all the wisdom I knew I should impart about how we only cut paper, you could've cut yourself, yada yada yada, until I gave up and burst into laughter.

That sad little face looked up at me, confused about the contrasting message my face and my words were sending and he crawled up into my lap and just hugged my neck with everything in him.

This is one of those times. One of those things…when all you can do is smile.

(And thank God picture day was LAST WEEK!)  :)

 More fun was had 'fixing' the haircut. 

Daddy turned him into 'Little Old Man, Ethan'

And then he buzzed him all. the.way.

Parenting is never dull. Of that much I am certain. 

Saying goodbye to 2014.

Something lately has been causing this little *tug* at my nostalgic "once-upon-a-time-I-was-a-blogger" heartstrings so I thought, "for the love of everything, just do it. Just open the blog and start writing." So I typed in the once familiar web address and clicked 'sign in.'

And BAM. I. Forgot. My. Password. If I were a twitterer (is that even what we call them?)  this would surely fall under  #bloggerfail , #iusedtobesogoodatthis, or #imissmyblog.

Well the upside is that it only took me 2 attempts and I got it right. Which brings me to now.

Hi. My name is Ami and this is my blog.

And it IS the last day of 2014, so time is of the essence.

I was reminded by some old and new friends today why I used to blog.  There is purpose beyond just keeping my memories in one neat place or my desire to tell funny stories about my family. Once upon a time, this blog brought hope to others in our same boat, whether that was triplet related or cleft related or cranial band related. It's brought laughter, it's kept my family connected and it's reminded so many that we are all the same when it comes to this thing called parenting. Most of all, I think it's reminded us to just laugh.

In talking with these friends today, I was reminded how grateful I am for this family I have…how long it took to get here and how every fear I had when I learned I was pregnant with triplets just sort of 'went away' as we began living our life and making it our own. As I left our visit, I wondered {and doubted} that I properly conveyed what an absolute blessing it is that they, too, have been chosen to be the parents of three little ones. (At once.) It was a nice way to end the year…it left me feeling thankful for my life and hopeful for theirs. :)

That does not change the fact that I was terrible at blogging this year. So many things happened that I never wrote about. I've often wondered why I let it go by the wayside and usually come up with the same excuses…I'm just too busy... I have too much work to do…I needed to clean the house…

Excuses. That's all they are.

I miss my blog. I miss my memories and I miss my blog friends.  I will be better.

If a toilet has to go unscrubbed for a few hours, then so be it. {Starting to hyperventilate already..} lol

My kids are funnier than ever right now and I don't want to forget these days.

But, unfortunately, half of my photos are on my old laptop so I don't even have all of 2014 in one place…but here, in a totally messed up order are some of my favorite memories from 2014. :)

Graduating from Sonshine Preschool! 

Their Pre-K Teacher, Mrs. Lucas 

My mom, one her best friends, Mrs. Lucas and the trio.

Ponka and Co.

Mother's Day Photos with Savannah Williamson

Me, My Mom and my sister

Apple Annie's with our friends the Hairgroves…this is always a favorite. I stood in that pumpkin patch just a few weeks pregnant with the triplets and every year since.  :)

Birthday parties with friends...

My niece turned 1…and then some.

Apple Annies

Our many Halloweens! E, H, C

 

My Kinder team: Anabelle and Jackie

Watching my nieces grow into big people! (Kinsley)

Brinley

Hanging with the Conca kids and Dave! 

My, how my kids adore their 'big kid' friends!

Reading to Ponka on Sundays

Visiting with Santa at Sonshine Preschool for Brinley's Holiday Program

"Friendsgiving" at the Pearson's with the Malms and Rioses

Making Gingerbread Houses in kindergarten! 

Christmas at Nana and Papa's

Nana and Papa

Aunt Kristen, Bella and the kids

Just being themselves. 

 

Swimming together at Nana and Papa's

Papa's Birthday! 

Road Trip to Page, AZ for a cousin's wedding! 

They maybe weren't supposed to be on that wall at the Glenn Canyon Dam….

At the wedding with Nana

Bar Hopping with my kids.

Greeting Ponka at the airport after his return from Vermont where he was in a very bad car accident.

Working in kindergarten at Cottonwood with my amazing team! 

The itty bitties STARTED KINDERGARTEN!!

Gale Tigers!

OMG, they're KINDERGARTNERS!!!!

10th anniversary stay-cation with some of our best friends!

Color Days in Kindergarten! Have I mentioned how much I love their school? 

Wine tour with lots of good friends! 

Little Man Graduated from SPEECH! 

Peanut Pie gets new glasses! 

Mother's Day on Mt. Lemmon

San Diego

Sea World Flamingo children

My handsome, grumpy husband. 

My handsome, HAPPY husband.  

Crazy how much I love this man. Despite how crazy we make each other. :)

Sadly, one of the FEW times I got to see my best friend, Jen this year!  

Jen and Nate (and little Allie's head!)

Ava and Hunter

Aunt Josie

Happy New Year, everyone. 

Make it a good one.