Did you say I'm having SURGERY tomorrow??

know I've been absent. I KNOW I've been neglectful...and I'm SORRY! I've been busy. Mostly busy chasing babies and cleaning up messes as we make them, which essentially leaves me cleaning up ALL DAY LONG...Still waiting for that darn fairy to show up. :)


But here's the thing. I have SO many blogs to do! Someday i'll get to them. But not tonight. Tonight's will be short and sweet because I need to get to bed. Big day tomorrow...


My first born son, Colton, Baby A, Bruiser, Squishy Boy, Bubba is having surgery. And I think part of me is delaying going to bed as if by avoiding the comforts and peace of my pillow, I can avoid tomorrow's arrival and the surgery that comes with it.

Triplet Solidarity. :)

Just doesn't seem fair. He's only 13 months old and he's having his second surgery. There's a tiny, little part of me that feels guilty that somehow my genetics are the cause of his cleft lip and palate and then another part of me knows that there was nothing I could've done differently. Sigh...And then I think to myself how lucky we are that this IS the extent of any of our babies' health issues. Some people would give anything for just 2 surgeries. So I will remember that. I will be grateful for the skilled surgeon, Dr. Hurst and his team who will take such good care of my baby.

But uugh...it doesn't make me feel much better. I just can't bear the thought of Colton being in pain or even the slightest discomfort. My heart aches already, remembering what we went through the first time. (If you want to read the entry from his cleft lip surgery, click here.) My heart hurts at the thought of him being apart from his brother and sister and wondering again where they went. And it hurts for Ethan and Hunter who will not understand why Colton is not with them, no matter how many times Gramma tells them. (Granted, they will enjoy 1/3 less competition for toys, but still, the few times they've ever been apart, they always seem kind of forlorn. That's the beauty of triplets....I know most people would rather stick sharp forks in their eyes before they would have triplets, but I'm telling you, there is a love there like no other...I am blessed. It's amazing how you can have so much love for 3 babies...

So tomorrow, we go back to UMC, birthplace of the Bunch Triplets, home of the NICU we called home for a month, and site of surgery #1. Surgery is at 9:00 and we will be there at 7:30 to get checked in and ready to go. I'm already dreading the moment I have to pass my little boy off to the doctors. My eyes are welling up with tears even as I write this...gulp. There's that damn lump in my throat again. This time I predict will be so much worse because Colton is so much more aware and alert. That kid is smart. And full of love, and giggles and smiles.

And I remind myself that this surgery will improve his quality of life so much. He needs this surgery and I'm so thankful that I live in world where it can happen. So for those who don't already know, this surgery will correct his cleft palate. (Basically, the roof of his mouth is open down the middle) There is no separation between his mouth and his nasal cavity which is why food shoots out of his nose so easily. Dr. Hurst will close up the roof of the mouth and then attach it to the back of the nasal cavity. He will not be able to eat any solid food for 2 weeks as his new palate will be "as delicate as wet tissue" as described by Dr. Hurst...yikes. We do not want it to get punctured or we will have to do this again.....

If you click on the button on my sidebar to "Access DNA" you can find anything you'd ever want to know about cleft lips and palates, but here is sort of what we can expect...

After the surgery for cleft palate:

This surgery is usually more involved and can cause more discomfort and pain for the child than cleft lip surgery. Your child's physician may order pain medicine to help with this. As a result of the pain and the location of the surgery, your child may not eat and drink as usual. An intravenous (IV) catheter will be used to help give your child fluids until he/she can drink adequately.

Your child will have stitches on the palate where the cleft was repaired. The stitches will dissolve after several days and they do not have to be taken out by the physician. In some cases, packing will be placed on the palate. Do not take the packing out unless you are told to do so by your child's physician.

There may be some bloody drainage coming from the nose and mouth that will lessen over the first day.
There will be some swelling at the surgery site, which will diminish substantially in a week.

For two to three days, your child will feel mild pain that can be relieved by a non-aspirin pain medication. A prescription medication may also be given for use at home.

Many infants show signs of nasal congestion after surgery. These signs may include nasal snorting, mouth breathing, and decreased appetite. Your child's physician may prescribe medication to relieve the nasal congestion.
Your child will be on antibiotics to prevent infection while in the hospital. Your child's physician may want you to continue this at home.

Your child may be in the hospital for one to three days, depending on your child's physician's recommendation.
A small amount of water should be offered after every bottle or meal to cleanse the incision. You can continue to rinse this area gently with water several times a day, if necessary.

Diet after surgery Your child's physician may allow breastfeeding, bottle-feedings, or cup-feedings after surgery. Your child should be placed on a soft diet for seven to 10 days after surgery. For older infants and children, age-appropriate soft foods may include strained baby foods, popsicles, yogurt, mashed potatoes, and gelatin. Note: your child should not use a straw or pacifier, as both could damage the surgical repair.

Activity after surgery Your child can walk or play calmly after surgery. He/she should not run or engage in rough play (i.e., wrestling, climbing) or play with "mouth toys" for one to two weeks after surgery. Your child's physician will advise you when your child can safely return to regular play.

So anyhoo....that's that. Thank you to everyone for your prayers and well wishes. It means so much. I will be doing updates hopefully from the hospital if I can.

Colton thanks you too...

Workin' My New Smile!

Well, Mr. Colton is back to looking like himself again! Hooray! As you'll see in these pics, he's not done healing completely but he's on his way! His nose tubes fell out finally, the bruising is just about gone, and also the patch of skin glue that was above his lip has come off as well! He is basically back to his old appetite now and he has the ABSOLUTE cutest new smile! I tried to capture it, but honestly, seeing it in person is SO much better! Dr. Hurst is amazing... I cannot believe what a difference this face is and with almost no scarring! We are so grateful to him for his dedication to our Colton's smile! The newest pictures are at the top, they get older as you scroll down...

Colton, Hunter and Ethan wearing their I LOVE New Orleans shirts!

Me and my Bro!

A new smile to love, and another we'll never forget...

Most of you probably know me by now, but if you don't, read on. My name is Colton Bunch. I am 3 months and 1 week old. I am a triplet. I am the oldest. I am the big brother. when I was still growing in mom's tummy, they found out that my lip did not look like my brother and sister's. I heard them say I had a cleft lip. I wondered if that would mean they wouldn't love me as much, but it didn't. In fact, I think it made everyone love me more. I love my smile, but sometimes I get sad that I can't keep a pacifier in my mouth like Ethan and Hunter. Or that I spit up a lot more of my food and it comes out of my nose and mouth. So I was kind of excited when mom and dad told me I was going to get a new smile. I was also a little scared, I mean, I am only a baby you know. So this past Tuesday, June 30th, I got a new look...I hope you like it. :) My mom will tell you the rest...
Again, most of you probably know ME by now too...probably far too much about me! But if you've just come across our blog, then here's the rest of our story. My name is Ami. My husband's name is Brian. We are the proud parents of 3 month old triplets, Colton, Ethan and Hunter. This story, however is about our first born baby boy, Colton. As he just told you, he was born with a bilateral cleft lip and palate. We knew about it before he was born, but never knew just how much his smile would melt our hearts and everyone's around him. Just look at his silly grin and you can't help but smile back. Colton and I had a strong bond from the very start. Probably because the mother instinct in me drove me to feel that I had to "protect" my little boy from the cruelty of the world. Before he was even born, we were anxious to get his smile corrected, but after he was born, that sort of changed...the more we got to know THIS little face, the sadder we became as his surgery date neared. But I was a kindergarten teacher for too long, and know all too well how harsh kids can be to one another. Deep down, I knew that fixing his lip was the right thing to do-for HIM and the rest of HIS life.

So this past Tuesday became a very BIG day for a very little boy....



The Friday before surgery, we took Colton to UMC for his Pre-Anesthesioloy appt. Here, we basically filled out all insurance paperwork and signed consent forms. Colton never even opened his eyes....

Here's mommy and her Baby Boy...

And Daddy and his little man...

This is the smile we had fallen in love with....

So with mixed emotions, on Tuesday morning, Aunt Mary and I packed up the little man, said goodbye to my other 2 babies and gramma and headed for UMC. Unfortunately, Brian had to be out of town for work, so he was unable to be here until later this night. Here, we are waiting to be called into the Pre-Op room.
Aunt Mary and her favorite Nephew. (Don't worry, she tells Ethan the same thing)

After not a terribly long wait, Colton was called into the Pre-op room where I answered questions about his health background for what felt like the tenth time to the the tenth different person. Colton was quite taken with his "Big Boy Crib." Never mind that it looks a bit like a baby jail cell...

I'll be honest, at this point, I am not nervous for the procedure itself, but only thinking ahead to the pain my little boy was about to be in and the struggle I would feel because I wouldn't be able to make him understand why....

You'll notice his awesome hospital gown...intended for a small child. Not a small baby. But he pulled it off. :)

Aunt Mary and Colton. Seriously. He's wearing a dress!

Fortunately, for my own well-being, Colton was in a great mood this morning. He was cooing, smiling and giggling at all the nurses.

How can you not love this goofy smile...

As we got closer to surgery time, the anesthesiologist and surgeon came in to talk with us about the procedure one last time. So look closely at the picture below....does he look familiar?? Think back to my C-Section. Yup! My friend, Tony (Dr. Lucas) came through for me again and was able to schedule himself to do Colton's anesthesiology! Thank you Tony...you will probably never know how grateful I am to you....

And this is the Surgeon who would forever change the grin that greeted me every morning in his crib, so happy to start a new day. This is Dr. Craig Hurst.

As you can see, Colton knows who to be afraid of... :)

"Don't worry baby boy. Mama will be waiting for you as soon as it's over. Don't be afraid little buddy."

And this would be the last time I ever saw that sweet smile...

It's a very strange feeling to hand your baby off to people he doesn't even know. Luckily for me, my friend Tony took Colton and carried him to the Operating Room. That helped mine and Mary's peace of mind tremendously, knowing that Tony was in there every minute, taking care of my baby.

And then the wait began....Dr. Hurst sort of estimated that it would take about 2 and half hours to complete the surgery, so that's kind of what Mary and I were going off of. So we waited out on the patio as the first hour passed, then the 2nd, then the 3rd and then the 4th hour....I will admit, I was a bit afraid of why the surgery was taking so long. But finally, we saw Dr. Hurst coming towards us on the patio to let us know how it went.

You know how you try to read a person's face before any words even leave their mouth? Well Dr. Hurst's was hard to read. "Is this bad?" I wonder. But, he said it went well. Didn't start on time (that explains one of the hours) because they had some difficulty getting Colton to sleep. (My POOR BABY!) But eventually they did, and the surgery went beautifully. Thus began our next wait....seeing him in the recovery room.

Tony came out and got us and took us into the recovery room. Walking into that room, filled with bed after bed, patient after patient, my mind raced wondering what I was about to see. As we approached Colton's cubicle, I heard his signature cry tainted with a bit of scratchiness from being intubated throughout surgery. All I could think was "I'm coming baby! Mama's coming." And no sooner than we walked into his "room", did his nurse, Eva, hand him to me, clearly having been unsuccessful herself at consoling him.

This is what I saw.

An absolutely miraculously done surgery, but a face I honestly did not recognize. I knew it was my baby, but his signature smile was gone. And he was in real pain.

Let me say this. Consider yourself lucky if you have never had to watch your own child, a baby in particular, go through something so traumatic. Remember tough me? The one who loves shark attacks and military shows? Well I take it back. When I saw him, I did not feel one ounce of tough. I felt absoutely miserable. All I could do was hold him, talk to him, let him hear my voice and tell him he'd be okay, even though I wasn't sure I believed that myself. He looked so pathetic. His cheeks were beginning to swell, the sutures keeping his lip together were tainted with blood and the tubes in his nose to keep his nasal passages open were straining his ability to take deep breaths. It was all I could do not to cry.

But this was a new role for me. I couldn't fall apart because I had to be there for my son. He needed me to smile at him and tell him how handsome he looked. Everyone says "don't worry, he'll never remember this." The problem though, is that I'll never forget. My sweet Colton, you are every bit as beautiful as you were the day you were born. You are a tough little man, much tougher than you should have to be...I am so proud of you.

Grampa and Aunt Mary, I know, felt every bit as anguished as I did that we could not console Colton or help him understand where he was and why he was hurting so much. Again, all we could do was talk to him and let him hear as many familiar voices as we could.

Not terribly long after, his wonderful nurse, Eva, told me they had his room ready on the 3rd floor, (the Pediatrics Unit.) She also told me that several of the nurses remembered Colton from his short stay in that unit just before he came home from the NICU. That actually made me feel better too knowing he was going back to a place he had already been. At this point, any bit of familiarity or comfort for Colton would do my heart good.

So Eva, Anthony, Colton and I headed off to 3W, the Pediatrics Unit.

And that began the longest night of my life. It was hard enough watching the poor little thing scream in pain, but add to that the fact that I had to try feeding him immediately using his special bottle. Oh my god...the anxiety I felt having to force a bottle into a very sore, swollen little mouth was enough to put me over the edge! But again. That's my job. This chair became our home away from home. We spent most of our time right here in this chair.
Later that night, Brian arrived from Phoenix and experienced the same bit of shock that I did upon seeing his little man, completely changed, for the first time. But also every bit as impressed at what an amazing job Dr. Hurst and the team did.

Also later that night, Aunt Mary traded roles with Gramma so that Gramma could steal away from Ethan and Hunter to come visit little Colton and sing to him. :)

It's been said many times now, how much Colton resembles Ethan now. Which stands to reason really. They are brothers, triplets at that. When he's all healed, I'll put up some comparison pictures of the two.

Well, because we wanted to maintain some normalcy for Ethan and Hunter, Brian decided to go home that night and take care of the other two munchkins while I would stay at the hospital and take care of the littlest patient. Let me just say, that may have been the hardest night of my life. Just when Colton would fall asleep, he would need to be awakened for pain medicine or vital sign checks or to attempt to eat, and would therefore scream in pain again. This cycle continued the whole night.

And there I sat, rocking my sweet boy just as best as I could while he cried. I became increasingly grateful for the constant beeps and blips of his heart monitors all night becase they helped cover the sound of my own crying that ensued each time Colton would drift back to sleep. I have never wanted a night to end so bad in my life. His nurses that day and night, Daria and Amy, were angels wearing scrubs. They had both been his nurses before when he stayed there after the NICU, and they both remembered him. I'm sure they could tell how upset I was and were therefore even more loving towards my little boy themselves. Some people are simply meant for careers like that and Daria and Amy are two of them. And though she wasn't his nurse this time, Laura came in to visit with us and Colton too. She had actually been his nurse one day while he in the NICU. Each one of them in their own way, made it easier to be there.

Somehow, morning finally came and I waited anxiously for Brian to get to the hospital. I just needed someone else there to bear some of the heaviness of Colton's care. Don't get me wrong, I did not want to give up my little boy to anyone, (and I really only let Brian hold him a few times probably!) but I needed support. Someone else to tell Colton he'd be okay and to take that burden off of me for just a few minutes. .

Those who know him, can probably see some of Ethan in these pictures of Colton's new face.

Here I am in frustration, confirming for poor nurse Daria, that Colton still had not eaten.

Little by little Colton began to eat again. We ended up having to entice him into eating by mixing his formula with Apple flavored Pedialyte. Worked like a charm, though his appetite just simply wasn't his usual. And what do you expect?

And here may be evidence of the worst part of the whole thing....notice Colton's elbow splints. He has to wear these, made of velcro and hard, pliable plastic on his arms to prevent him from messing with his sutures and nasal tubes. Poor baby can't even put his arms down by his sides.

I like to think he's saying, "Mommy, I love you THIS much!"

There's Dad, hanging out.

And here I go again, trying to feed Colton.

This is a card that Gramma helped Ethan and Hunter make for their big brother. Colton was happy to see their faces. He missed them and so did I.

After a little uncertainty about whether or not Colton was going to be able to go home that night, we got the word! He was free. Though I would need to really work hard to get him to keep eating.

"Goodbye Nurse Daria! Thank you for taking such good care of me! I'll see you at the new building for my palate surgery!"

Does this hallway look familiar?

Baby Boy, we're goin' home!

This picture is 2 days post-op. The swelling, believe it or not, has gone down tremendously, but the bruising has only begun to worsen.

Those who knew Colton before will feel the same sense of amazement that we did at how absolutely different he looks.

Ethan wanted Colton to know he was there for him, so he wore the elbow splints as a show of solidarity!

Home once again, Aunt Mary is there to rock me while I get better....
And I'm here to work on my new smile.

So though I do not have even MORE recent post-op surgery pictures up here yet, I'll say this. I had no idea how much pent up anxiety I still felt for my poor little man, until tonight. I was sitting on the floor watching Colton in his bouncy seat, just talking to him, telling him how much I loved him. And somehow, through sutures, tubes and bruises, he honestly forced a smile. And all I could do was cry. And he did it again and I cried some more. Brian confirmed that I was not imagining it :) and said to Colton, "Thank you buddy. You just did your mom's heart good."

And he sure did.